guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
