office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.