He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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