I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
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I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.