I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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