is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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