i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
