Whod you bang
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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