god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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