i wish there were pregnant emoticons
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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