I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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