I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
there is glitter all over my balls
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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