he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
