Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
