yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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