I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
