yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
