It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
