Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
