That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
