In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
then he tried to convert me to islam
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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