Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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