i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
