Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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