what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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