listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize