i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
