I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
