He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize