Having a random hookup so left but love u
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
