grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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