Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
