I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
