its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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