the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.