your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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