i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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