let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
This gyro tastes like lonliness
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I did not marry a roomba.
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