they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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