So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
