oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize