You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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