you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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