Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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