I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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