I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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