your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
