She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
