she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize