normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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