it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
